Since Thursday evening LeeR has been too weak to walk, sit up, talk, eat, drink, or even open his eyes. As he mumbled with the slightest of smiles yesterday, "Well, this is a revolting development." He keeps us smiling while we are all trying not to cry.
Thankfully, LeeR is not in pain and so far the nausea has been controllable. Sleep comes easily but he wakes every hour or two for help getting to the bathroom. We've gained so much expertise and are just so efficient now with the process that we have strained our arms from patting ourselves on the back. But it did take a village to get to our present state of calm, peace, satisfaction, and even occasional smiles from LeeR:
- After two nights of trying every device available (wheelchair, 2-wheeled walker, 4-wheeled walker, full crutches, and half-crutches) to transfer from the bed, through the narrow openings between furniture, and into the bathroom, it dawned on me that we somehow needed to change places with our very heavy bed and the very, very heavy mirrored double dresser. So this morning I called my wonderful sons-in-law and asked if they could come help. They were so willing and we worked out a couple of time frames hoping that if I could find other helpers they could come at one of those times. So I called my amazing neighbor who happens to be our high priest group leader and explained my need. He said that at that moment at his house two doors down he was holding a HP leadership meeting, thanks for calling, and "we are on our way." I did ask them to wait 15 minutes so I could prepare a little for the move and help LeeR to get settled somewhere away from the bedroom. Sure enough, five strong and compassionate men showed up and a half-hour later the room was rearranged, doors were removed, furniture was put in other rooms, vacuuming and dusting of baseboards and carpet under the hidden areas was completed (shhh...I promised I wouldn't tell their wives), and the bedroom was magically transformed into a very liveable space for our needs. It was amazing.
- Saturday morning I was able to have a peaceful sister day with my sisters and dear Aunt Bonnie--a friend of my parents from my early childhood who has become one of my dearest friends. It wasn't until one of our kids introduced "Aunt" Bonnie to her new husband and he asked, "now, whose sister is she--your dad's or your mom's?" that they realized she wasn't really an aunt at all. But then again, she always has been and always will be our Aunt Bonnie. It was so nice to enjoy the morning with them and to feel of their concern, support, strength, and love.
- It seems that every time I went in or out of the front door this weekend, there was a treat on the doorstep: soups, bread, cookies, salads, informational pamphlets, etc., etc. One friend brought bags of fruit. Another came with a watermelon and stayed to help change bedding. Yet another brought two very healthy delicious vegetable dishes and homemade chocolate pudding and then let me talk her ear off. And still another dear friend and neighbor brought a beautiful handmade (by her) quilt for us to use, cherish, enjoy and then wrap ourselves in after LeeR's 100th birthday party. With every gift, I cried. It's amazing to me how everyone has been so respectful of LeeR's need for quiet and yet so in tune with our needs. I wish I could be that kind of friend and neighbor.
- Our family and all of the branches of this "big ole' family tree" has been amazing. From near and far they have called, texted, told actuary-appropriate jokes, helped lower the bed a foot, cheered us with grandkids, cleaned up, helped lift and move, and showered us with hugs, concern, empathy, prayers, and love. We couldn't get through this without their support. This I know.
So tonight I'm overwhelmed with gratefulness for love, service, prayers, hope, progress, friends, family, sunshine, peace, joy, and especially for our own little village. Love and enormous thanks to all you villagers, Karen
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